Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Warning: Another Rant

This time, we're talking phone companies. In particular: Vodafone.

Himself is in the wilds of Scotland. His mobile tariff was due to end, and he was required to call them with his sim number in order to move to a new tariff. So far so easy. He called them, gave the necessary information. The chappy said "I'm just switching you now", and the line went dead. So, I got a call from pissed-off husband (from a payphone - he had 20p) telling me that his sim was now showing 'invalid', and would I please call Vodafone and sort it out.

Great.

The first moron I spoke to said she couldn't deal with me as it would be illegal to make any changes to my husband's account without his permission. "But you already have," I said."You didn't have his permission to invalidate his sim." But she wouldn't budge. She needed to speak with him, she said, and him alone, despite the fact that he is currently inhabiting the northern wilds with a non-working phone (and absolutely no inclination to stand in a freezing phone box feeding 20ps into the slot while waiting for someone to put down his cup of tea down long enough to answer the bloody phone.). I suggested telepathy, but she didn't see the funny side. In fact she didn't see my side of it at all, and put the phone down. (Though that might have been because I shouted at her).

The second moron was a bit more helpful. She was quite prepared to act illegally (huh?), but when I read her the number that himself had given me from the back of his sim card, she said it didn't exist, and that she couldn't do anything without the number from his actual sim, the one in his actual phone...

I won't bore you with the rise and fall of my temper (mostly rising) over the following hour, only to say that that was how long it took for absolutely nothing to happen. Husband is still stranded in the northern wilds without a phone. Fortunately, he is stranded within inches of a bar populated by rather a lot of our mates (and he's not actually stranded). I told him he can deal with it.

PlusNet has entered my consciousness by trying to charge me a cancellation fee for cancelling a service I reckon they didn't provide: 48kps anyone? Call that broadband? I don't.

Watch this space...

11 comments:

Lily Sheehan said...

Vodafone minions are useless. When I had my phone pinched they promised to cancel it but didn't. I'm so planning to switch to orange when my contract ends... unless anyone can tell me if they are useless too

KAREN said...

How utterly frustrating. And we thought technology was supposed to make our lives easier!

On a similar topic I had to fight to get my son's (prescribed) inhaler from the local chemist's this morning. He really needed it today and I made a special trip to be told the pharmacist was 'stuck in traffic' and they're not allowed to hand things out unless he's there. GRRR. Fair enough, but they KNOW who I am, having been in umpteen times before etc etc. Anyway they handed it over when I refused to budge, but not without much head shaking and tutting and 'we shouldn't really be doing this,' and 'if he finds out we'll be in trouble.' High blood pressure? Moi?

HelenMH said...

What is the matter with these people? I share your frustration darling x

Lane said...

Not a productive day eh. The wasted time is soul destroying.

I told him he could deal with it. ! Good job he's near a bar:-)

JJ said...

OMG, what a nightmare! They're all the same these companies - all useless.

Annie Wicking said...

Hi, my dear friend it sound to like you could do with a nice cup of tea, so I've made you one.

Enjoy, while I do a bit of shouting for you... lol

Best wishes,

Annie

womagwriter said...

Aarrgghh how frustrating. Guess I'd better keep quiet about the fact my hubby works for Vodafone, in a roundabout way. He was in their IT department, got outsourced to EDS who've been taken over by HP, but still the projects he runs are for Vodafone. Nothing to do with customer services, only stuff to do with billing systems. Wonder if he can compensate you from the inside as it were.

Leigh said...

Lily - I'm sure Orange are just as bad, but with better coverage...

Karen - That's bad. Bad. Bad. The tutting is a particularly bad sign. Fortunately, though, these people are not in government.

Helen - They're not very bright?

Lane - I'm sure he spent all evening drowning his sorrows ;-)

JJ - "Helpline:" one of the world's great misnomers (along with 'customer care').

Oh, Annie, and with brandy in it... just what I needed. You're a darling.

Womag - The trouble is it's so rarely the fault of the person you speak to. I have little doubt that the average Vodafone worker does a splendid job. It's the dimwits who write the scripts that bother me. Bet they don't have to call the helpline when they have problems.

Tam said...

My husband has to deal with Plusnet at work as the nursery schools we support have an adsl line from them. He had a protracted conversation with someone in India which went round and round in circles until he was ready to punch someone.
Poor you and poor Mr Leigh. Hope you get there in th end...

Zinnia Cyclamen said...

Big corporations. Bah.

Kate Lord Brown said...

Hello Leigh - found you through the brilliant Writing about Writing (and I'm in need of your wordometer because the next book is coming ...) I've spent so long 'on hold' the last few days I'm going to record a tape to play back to *them* when they finally pick up (perhaps accompanied by greensleeves): 'I'm sorry, your client has a life and has gone to make a coffee/save the universe/pick the children up from school. We appreciate your time is valuable, but perhaps you would like to hold for the indefinite future ...' Would it catch on?